read a great article today called “the end of purity culture.” it was fascinating since i feel i grew up in the midst of this culture of “saving yourself” and “purity rings.” while there are some good attributes of this culture, it did simmer some feelings of self-righteousness and high ideals that were not necessarily bad, but perhaps cultivated a rigidity and loftiness. the article talks about some of the harmful ideals behind the purity movement:
“The purity culture told us to wait, and it also placed a major emphasis on finding the person who will bring our waiting to an end. When we live according to this philosophy, we live like we’re on hold until we get married. Many singles live disillusioned or marry just to marry, which quickly leads to unrealistic expectations. And once marriage does happen, the once unsatisfied single may expect his or her spouse to meet all of his or her deepest needs.”
this waiting and holding can be applied to different ideals such as parenthood, careers, etc. one of the big things i feel that is super important is that the
“Purity culture also led us to believe that we weren’t complete until we were married, but Christ says that no individual completes us, and that our identity is in Him.”
in our culture, this idea of “completeness” is such an urgent goal that we often kill ourselves trying to obtain the perfect job where passion and money meet, the lofty pinterest laden home, the best-dressed/acting children, the newest organic-ist farm-to-table meal, a perfect spouse, the ideal weight, etc. however, we are children of God. is this not enough? last weekend over a retreat, our speaker really hit on this point, “if you truly understood what it meant to be a daughter/son of God, how would your life change?” i realized i would probably be happier, less anxious and more giving.
how can you live your life more by knowing your are fully loved, fully adored, and fully pursued?